Spider

Read slowly for full effect. Envision. Imagine.

Imagine this: a spider. You have an image in your head. But it's not the right image. No no, I'm talking about a big spider. A HUGE spider.

Now you think you know what I'm talking about. You think you understand; you've got it all straight now. You're still wrong. When I said huge, I meant huge.

You envisioned something pretty small. You know a new-born baby? That's pretty small. So when I said "huge spider", why did you envision something smaller than a newborn baby? That's just illogical. Imagine huge.

Ok, ok, NOW you understand, right? When I say huge, I mean huge. Now, I'm not sure where your imagination has gone with this yet, but I assume you're probably comparing sizes with that Lord Of The Rings spider, or maybe that Harry Potter spider. But those spiders are tiny compared to the idea that I'm trying to get across.

Try to imagine: you have never imagined a spider this large. Picture it. Now, I'm no expert, but maybe in your head right now you're looking at a spider the size of a city, or a mountain. Well, you are now. And your common sense is telling you that anything much bigger than that is just impractical to imagine, because it would upset the very foundations of our social structure and economy. Maybe even the weather.

Now I'm tangenting, forgive me... Imagine an entire civilization living on a speck of dust. Imagine them going on in their own little world, economizing economics, structuring structures, and stealing Christmases. Would they be worried about us big humans upsetting their balance? Could we upset them if we tried? They would be so small, we couldn't even affect them. Now, imagine that the earth is that speck of dust. Now imagine a spider next to it.

*pause, for dramatic effect*

No. You're still thinking too small. What you see now is a normal spider that makes the earth look like a speck of dust. Remember that spider that was the size of a mountain? Imagine THAT spider next to the speck of dust that is our earth. Think harder. Envision it: our earth, suspended in space; this spider, making us look like a speck of dust on Mount Everest. It's hard to comprehend. Just think about it again, I'm not so sure you've got it yet.

This creature would be unknown to us earthlings, because it is so large it doesn't even affect us. I'm talking about a spider the size of our galaxy, the Milky Way. A spider, yes, in the fact that it has eight legs. But any other resemblance to an earthly arachnid is only speculation. There is no knowing. How it moves, from galaxy to galaxy. How it breathes. What it eats. This cosmic spider is as mysterious as it is large. There is no knowing.
Now you see this big, huge, giant, cosmic, TITANIC spider. So, imagine with me. Imagine with me for just one second:

Spiders.